An honest reflection of me- in fragments. Imperfect- Grace Covered. Balance. Mom. Wife.
Nurse. Homeschool Teacher. Christ follower first. Second changes. Thankful.

So I made cupcakes....

Friday, January 8, 2010

Your heart stopped
I cried
Your daddy held me and he cried too
They had to take you out of me
I hated it
My heart ached
But my attention was needed elsewhere
And it helped
It was your sisters 2nd birthday
A party to host and a life to celebrate
It was a good distraction
So I scrubbed toilets
And washed the floors
I dusted tables
And I made cupcakes

One year ago I lost you
And just like last year there are cupcakes to be made
And a life to celebrate
And while I'm sad I mourn your life instead of celebrate it
I'm not as sad as I was before
I know your whole
I know I'll see you someday
And we'll celebrate then

So today...I'll make cupcakes
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4 comments:

Gerie Owens said...

Jamie,
You don't know me but I was Jacob's teacher for 3rd grade. We're on your Christmas list so we recently received the picture of Ethan and Charlie. I thought, "These are the most adorable-looking kids I've ever seen." Then I remembered that in last year's letter you mentioned being pregnant and my heart sank because there was no baby in the picture. I'm so sorry that your baby girl had to go home before you got to know her well. My dad passed on to heaven just before Christmas and now heaven is more real to me. I think he'd like to have an adopted great-grandbaby to hold if that's ok.
I want to tell you how much I loved having Jacob as a student all those years ago and mostly how glad I am that the Lord brought him you for a life-mate. Looking at Ethan's sweet little face was looking at Jacob, sitting so attentive and well-behaved at his desk; eager to learn, eager to please -- funny, smart and creative with just a hint of mischievousness in those sparkling eyes. Such a joy.
Your writing is wonderful, don't ever stop. I'm certain Jacob must leave you plenty of love notes because that's just the way he is. God is good.
Blessings,
Gerie Owens

Anonymous said...

you've probably heard this song, but if not, i think you'd like it.

glory baby by watermark

Jamie Gunn said...

Thank you Gerie!

Anonymous - I hadn't heard that song - thank YOU - Eventhough it made me cry. Don't feel bad, it wasn't a hopeless cry, more a cry of empathy, emotion and understanding.

God BLESS
Jamie

Sarah said...

I love you. Can't wait to meet your beautiful little girl in heaven someday. :)




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